An Introspection

-Aakriti Thatal Lighting Her first cigarette, Inhaling the smoke, the heat and the pang: She let her colours show And Her wings out. She shone. Brighter than the flame igniting her fag, did she shine. The flakes fluttering in the void, glowed'. Orange. Vibrant. She was Happy. The other smiled there, the passive smoker. Smiled. Smiling. Smile. Smile? The cigarette was Blithe. Life. She lived One. With cigarettes taking her breath little-by-little, did she live. She lived Once. Taking in the last puff, She smiled, hollow. Pain. End. Life. Once. One. Cigarettes. Her inhaler. Little did it take for the bright flakes fluttering, turn Gray. A very short while. Ash. They were Happy for a very short while.

-Aakriti Thatal Two lives I have. One. The tearing and dreading turmoil  Of who scores more and how much  Have I improved since the last time. A state of conquest and competition.  A state of superiority and also  Complexes. The Other. The one with You. There is equity and unison.  There is tranquility over conquest and contentment over competition. There is serenity and uniqueness in being two as one. There is merriment and joy in being together. There do I live. And how I wished I could live there, that life, Forever.  (If, Forever, exists.)

A dark Image set forth my eyes: I behold everyday. Difficult but Pure. Different but True. Love- Me and You. -Aakriti Thatal

It's been wet, the last few days. Have been staying indoors, lately. One of very limited interesting stuff to do indoors, at my place, is to grab a book and dive into one. Been reading Dan Brown. The Da VInci Code was convincing and so was Angels and Demons. Currently reading The Lost Symbol. Cannot wait to complete it. P.S. I do not really know what's going on in the outside world (in my vicinity). But, I surely do know and am learning more on the outside world (outside my vicinity) through the factual-fiction (is there a phrase as such?) I have been reading. Dan Brown is a Genius. 

-Aakriti Thatal I see myself, colourful and vibrant. Vivid and exposing. Nothing more than colourful monotony. I see You Gray. Proper and pertinent. Your shades and different stories. I see Variations. You are venerable. You are part of many photographs of mine. How I wish I was part of Yours too.

-AAKRITI THATAL  Sheltering a multitude of colours under it, BLUE- A Feeder, a Shelter, a Holder. Blue is Deep and Wise, Confident and Divine. Blue is food to the mind. Blue scatters much, not bothering the eye. Blue is Phenomenal, Omnipresent.  Blue is Truth and "TRUTH SHALL PREVAIL". Blue is Replete. Boxed inside Blue, free, is a shade I am fond of; The shade which I paint and show and display. The colour with and in which I grew. The world where I grasp and learn and round off. Under the Big Blue is a tinge of YELLOW; Always Together. Happy. Warm. Cheerful. Exercising the humour and grasping attention; Yellow is pleasant. Yellow, eccentric. Yellow polarizes, yet it shines. Yellow is forever Ebullient.  Yellow, Mild. Ambitious about its scattering just as much as Blue's, GREEN is covetous. Harmonizing with Red, Gray, Brown and White; Green is a symphony- Mellifluous and Calm. An imbecile, an innocent; Green

-AAKRITI THATAL Dt.: 07/05/'15 The night laid forward its cozy arms and embraced these souls beautifully; there was no other bliss. For most people wished the nights were a little longer providing them the ample hours to rest their tormented bodies, these souls only wanted the night to elongate to pour their hearts out. The night, like a faithful friend, a sturdy shelter, a shoulder to rest a tired head upon, merged in with these souls as the souls merged in along the Night. Bliss, solace, peace, Night. The Nights were long, but how they wished they were a little longer, how they could pour a little more, sink a little deeper, fall a little harder, rise a little higher. The Night stood as an epitome of an abode of love, the Night fell only for these souls, to stitch the torn pieces the day had brought, to live again. Solace, found perfect in the Night, Healing done good. But, the cruel morning light paves its way from the dark, warm, cozy night and brings a scorch on thes

-AAKRITI THATAL. I look at myself, sometimes; Superficially. The skin- Dark. Gloomy.  I go deeper. Not skin-deep. Deeper beneath.  Choking, struggling to break free from  A life that is only a Lie.  A Lie- Cold and Intolerable.  With cavernous darkness emanating  From the grotto of 'the core'- The Heart.  A Lie, I am unaware of. Crawling and flowing through every vein in my body; A piece of me, ephemeral.  My eyes are dark and criminal. So many things seen but not shown.  'Views', unfathomable, Actions, unpleasant to the soul.  These eyes have seen the others Shine and also cry; These eyes have lived long enough to 'just die'.  Trepidant lips, trying to utter words to expedite emotions; Trying to jerk up a lip into a word. Struggling the best to make my feelings and thoughts more accentuated.  These lips have a multitude of tales to tell. I WISH I HAD THE POWER.  I WISH PEOPLE KNEW.  I WISH

"Open Your arms, love That is where I Belong." DIVINITY . - AAKRITI THATAL. She walks the street like it's Her ight; Down towards me, She smiles her fang out. Her eyes shine, heart pounds, breath swells, Reflecting Her profuse contentment. Both absolve the long waiting, and Forgive the distance for keeping them Longing for a sight, a glance, a touch, a feel, a breath. The warmth of Her soul, Its influx Soothes and calms the other soul. Halt. A moment of pause. A gesture of "what?" "Open Your arms, love That is where I Belong." Their esoteric connectedness, their bond, None abrogate their love for each other. They are Divine. 

-AAKRITI THATAL. People come, people go. Some bring some, some take some. Some exalt their prestige over other's demureness; Some submit themselves to other's service. Somebody's pride, lofty like the mountains high; Somebody's humility, revealing Devine light. Some sinned; Some complied. Some don't justify a prejudice; Some misdirect. Somebody's obnoxious presence; Somebody's noticed absence. Some prissy bodies; Some repulsive souls. Somebody wording damnation; Somebody seeking salvation. Some, pulling all to oneself- greedy. Some benevolent, giving to all, not always needy. Some separate; Some always recompile. But, All affect. Some good affections, some bad.  It is your maneuver.  What move do you choose to take?  What footprint shall you imprint on others?  (Photograph credit: www.ColorPagesforMom.com) 

How many times can a person fall in love? Countless? But is there a love that suffices a lifetime, if not last? "For Once. " -AAKRITI THATAL Was it Fear that held me back?  The fear of not matching shoulders?  The fear of not being liked?  Or, was it leakage?  A leakage, taking away the zest from my life.  Life from my soul.  A leakage, never sealed.  Could it be that I got carried away?  This mind I possess took things to a station unvisited.  "Love is Eternal."  The heart knows not much about love, but it is learning lessons on Sacrifice.  This soul knows not many, but it knows You belonged here.  Eternity sounded large.  However, none realised it was as large as large could be. And we, we were larger.  Stages stepped on with age.  Faces new with every changing phase.  Emotions and speculations on New people.  New people, knew little.  The tenure was uncertain.  The tenure was not detrimental. What h

-AAKRITI THATAL. I thought it would be:  - A single blow of the wind, striking once and gone forever.  - A soft hit by the wave of the stream flowing unidirectional.  I thought it would be a phase that would pass by.  Yes. It was a single strike of the blowing wind, and it brought us immense destruction.  Gone was our resort along with the wind.  Gone were everything.  The wind was disastrous. And the single blow struck us a thousand times.  The stream did flow along in one direction, showing obeisance to the natural laws.  Bowing down, it flowed downwards; on and on and on it went.  A soft hit every time the waters flowed; leaving the rock behind, slippery and unstepped.  Aware are we, all of us, of the blow of the wind and the strike of the wave. A thousand times it will strike, bringing a thousand times pain.  All of us know it, yet none want it so early.  Who could be suited to endings so plainly? 

-AAKRITI THATAL You. Possessing an aura, strong, Holding extravagant strength, Envisioning a world of your own; You are POWER. You. Crafting thoughts and shaping words, Bending pens and jotting words; You are ART. You. Talking might and spending bounds, Traversing lands and exploring facts; You are RICH. Marching forth, You are a SOLDIER. You give, You are a GIVER. You fight, You protect, You save; You are a SAVIOUR. BUT, are you real? Who are You behind all that showcase? Who is it You see, when You look into the mirror? Because when I do, Is it You? And more importantly, is it True? I looked at You, and I could feel the pricks in Your aura. I saw You weak, engulfing Yourself into the maddening crowd. Where is Your Power? Was it not True? I read Your words and Your pictures, Nothing but plain messages and vocabulary. Where is Your Art? Did it get mixed with the colours, dark? Or, among the empty pen refills? Where is the Truth? I enjoyed the

Eleanor Roosevelt once quoted:                 "Small minds discuss people Average minds discuss events Great minds discuss ideas." According to me, it is true to a great extent. Sixteen years with two people of the same age group does wonders.  Siblings-a great audience to perform for and good partners. living in a family with siblings often leads to varied thoughts and ideologies. And one inevitable event and fact is, discussion over a particular stuff. A discussion both positive and negative.   Long back when the three of us siblings, got into some kind of discussion over a person or an event, our father used to resolve our conflict quoting the above mentioned words. For some, 'work hard, be humble', 'Be kind', et cetera might fill the space for the golden words or 'the key'. For me, this is the key and the motivation to live up to. I have always admired my father for having said these words to us.  I believe, it lifts us up fr

-AAKRITI THATAL.  Where does the world start?  Can something come from nothing? Does something not have a start? Who breathed the first fresh air? Who ate the first fruit of the first tree? Who lives beyond the scriptures and what contains the start of the world except for the Book of Genesis? Who was the first person on Earth? Who loved first? Who had the first senses?  Adam and Eve exist in books because a thought lives.  A thought.  Does it come from nothing?  Thoughts are the result of human consciousness and awareness, of the power of manipulation and exaggeration. The world might have started in the Garden of Eden or the world could also be a result of The Big Bang. Maybe it was Adam who enjoyed the first fruits or could it be the animals that survived the ice age. It could be that Adam made the first love in the world with Eve, or maybe it is just an animal, a mammoth, a bear who first reproduced.  Maybe Adam had the first senses or the birds in the air or t